Who will walk the dogs?

In my family, it is a constant struggle to delegate or dish out some convincing statement to entice a brother or sister even a parent to take your place in the executioner’s room, with nothing but a monthly allowance akin to a convict’s last meal, likely roast beef. Who will walk the dogs? Well, typically I give them an emergence into the neighborhood and turn back for the hills of freedom: my laptop where I write, my the couch in the living room next to a blanket basket, and a coaster where I immerse my moss green eyes into a book, my ears plugged with tunes, playlists on Spotify like those designed for an ice skating rink or gym as I am a spunky exercising pack rat, often viewed by others as the gal who carries groceries back to her house uphill in accordance with my verbatim: “Cut down on gasoline, keep the gas stations’ daring hands off me money, save our planet!!!”

Yeah … some days it is a good thing. I do have rapid cycling Bipolar type 1 disorder, so… if my mood is dark or low (ψ(`∇´)ψ I am not that fun I ain’t know them dark arts or dark eyeliner even though I’m a natural beauty … recently my boyfriend inquired: Besides the facepaint *wearing red eyebrows with Halloween face coloring* are you wearing make-up… the thrill and excitement of my boyfriend telling me how pretty I am is a potted plant in my corner where I can always tap in!) enough I do not want to do school work yet my brain tells me as if on caffeine that I still have the energy to lift my body, trace my steps back to where I left my phone: an Otter Box cased Apple product that has a decorative sticker King from The Owl House on the back of the case like a warm gift that it is from my sister… then proceed to click on random Youtube video skip ad buttons until I collapse in utter defeat.

Also, I do like walking dogs. Typically, while doing so I tell myself it is to drop waste circumference and if I walk them it means I get good girl points! Not only does it leave the dogs happy and relived beyond anything any of the avoidant games I take part in with my family but it makes everyone who would have done it feel impressed by me and they give their tip of hat kind of thanks.

Today, Mummy told me I was too “efficient” because I walked the dogs before a rat reper came to inspect the pantry … anyway the mutts barked up a cacophony of wilted rust-colored wind-traveling leaves with no walker to leash them on out of our once quiet and peaceful casa.

I sometimes sing Gus Dapperton, Del Water Gap, and Lady Gaga. Anything fierce as I turn a corner and notice the landscape change: a neighbor might add a Halloween decorum like a howling gravestone singing some classic laughter punched knock dead, a tree might be uprooted, the opposite, a sapling might be rooted anew.

The answer to the mystery question yesterday was originally me, derailed to my brother because I had therapy, then finally flip-flopped onto my poor parents because my brother was cranky and too tired to do it.

In the dawn of pet ownership, I was sworn in as the ONLY dog walker: Morning at five am before the school bus, Afternoon immediately after school dismissal at three, and Night after dinner feeding each dog two scoops of meaty brunch crunchies.

This is why I have serious feelings about my brother’s lack of initiative. Things have changed and I would love the youngest to follow in my paws as alpha.

He has potential too. He buys the dogs food and toys with his chore money (he receives a crisp dollar for every dog he walks; we have three in need of three walks as we have no backyard in order for them to prance like deer in an open space.)

He cooks up a mean smashed boiled sweet potato and spinach for them to easily go… and also he loves them … even Duffy …

The Duffy story is we got him as an emergency adoption because Grandpa had to find a new home for him because he is a problem package like how he trips people. Or maybe you could look at how he smells overpowering wafted ham. Or how he barks, does not stop, and annoys me while I do home gym girl stuff… I consider that dog a menace but he is aight. Like how he … okie I cannot say a good thing but I think all dogs have a right to a safe home so there!

Bree the only girl in the pack is also trouble with a cap T.

She is a biter. She never bites the hand that feeds her but she will not tolerate other dogs like Cody and Duffy. When another dog crosses paths with our walk… she will bite Cody or Duffy so I just rein her leash in and stay vigilant.

How awesome are your pets? Mine are pretty cool but wow they are a handful.

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